things my daughters may forgive me for

So it's been an interesting few days. Friday morning Emma fell from my shoulders onto her head while we were on the sidewalk. While I'm happy to report that the only lingering effect is a mild headache when she does a somersault, I still spent the day feeling like a terrible man let alone parent. Yesterday Ellie was in her carseat on the table and was excitedly rocking back and forth so much she fell off the table. I dove and caught her and absorbed the bulk of the damage. It was like the lowest low to the highest high in 72 hours. Still searching for work. There really is a science to selling yourself.
My family has kind of been in flux for the past few weeks. Laurie has been having some huge spiritual discoveries and is working to implement some new practices into our day to day. Our careers are still a point of concern. Jason is working through some issues of where he needs to be right now and Julie and Rob are again on the move to the states. The Lord has provided for us already in so many ways. Who knows what will happen tomorrow but really, why worry about it? Soooo tired....kids must sleep later...

In a nutshell

6107 FEDERALIST DRIVE • GALLOWAY, OH 43119 • PHONE 614-572-3691
E-MAIL OLJONNYHURD@YAHOO.COM
JON HURD
EMPLOYMENT
November 2000- July 2007 Meijer Stores Limited Partnership Columbus, OH
Odd jobs/Cashier/Receiving department
October 2007 –November 2007 Pearson Ed. Measurement
Marker, Student Proficiency Exams
January 2008-March 2009
Family Service Professional Sunset Cemetery
March 2009-Present
Title Runner Car Source
EDUCATION
1995-2000 Bethany Bible College Sussex, NB Canada
B.A. Religion, Youth Ministry Major
 Education and practical experience combined – included a 10-week internship as a youth pastor’s assistant in Shelbourne, NS.
REFERENCES
Rev. Neil Horner, Pastor, Woodstock Wesleyan Church 506-328-3263
Adam Rinehart, Attorney in private practice 614-406-8927
Tim Sutton, Project Manager, Verizon Business 614-507-7796

VOLUNTEER EXPERIENCE
1999-2000 Student Ministry assignment at Penobsquis Baptist Church leading worship and planning youth events, serving as a youth leader
2001-2007 Volunteer youth sponsor for the middle school ministry of Cypress Wesleyan Church under the direction of pastors Rick Rucker and Nathan Swartz.
2008-present Volunteer with church technical team running camera and video wall

Transition Lenses

So we are experiencing a shift in our lives. It makes you view things in a different way. Laurie lost her job at Cypress after 10 years of shifting responsibilities. Out of the blue. No warning or inclination. So that caused us to have to process a lot of new information. How will we afford childcare without an 80% discount? Will we have to move in a terrible housing market? Will we have to leave scant months after Grandma and Grandpa moved here from Virginia to be closer to their grandchildren? Will I finally get a real job? Will it be in ministry?
Trusting in God to provide is easy when you have a steady stream of income. The real test of your belief in his "plan" comes when you can't see 2 weeks ahead let alone 3 months. My personal life has been experiencing some spiritual victories lately and I find it not coincidental at all that this time of uncertainty overlaps it.
On the family front, Ellie is 3 and a half months old and Laurie swears she got her to laugh at her this week. Emma is a young lady and full of energy and enthusiasm for life. She is a girly girl and I will struggle to make her a fan or participant of any sport.
We are still planning on taking our cruise in November but we shall see. This month we are social butterflies. No less than five nights with other families at our home or theirs. We've been wanting this for a long time: To be the type of people who enjoyed others company as often as possible.
Ten things I'm into...
Community on NBC
Sketchers
Blue Dew (Voltage)
Yatzee nights
Harry Potter
The new Team Canada logo
Moose Munch
Purity
Hating new facebook
Leonard Sweet

Losing thoughts out my ears

Generally my decisions are rash so me blogging again should come as no surprise. I feel like being a part of all of your lives again and this is how. Sorry. Genius awaits!

Farewell, for now

I was at the auto title department and they had a box where you could leave suggestions or comments. Presumably on the job they were doing. Nice. Only there were NO CARDS!!! Had I the quick-wittedness , I would have written on scrap paper the need for an actual means to suggest something.
Having had much difficulty getting inspired to write, I humbly take a bow and leave the blogging spotlight.
Please feel free to leave suggestions or comments. And live outside the lines.

Stuff I tried to remember

While on vacation we took four flights. I discovered that for some reason, when I fly, I order tomato juice. I never drink it at other times. Only on airplanes.
I was in the bank the other day and I noticed something disturbing about myself. There was some really lame song on the radio and I found myself tapping along. I looked down horrified and immediately stopped. But it made me think about a trend that has developed. I listen to a lot of sports radio because I drive all day and I catch myself humming along to the ridiculous jingles. Or if I'm in a business that has music playing I sing in my head along with it. Even if I hate it! Especially if I hate it!
I think I'm going to start collecting shoes that are left on the highway. I'm flabbergasted at the number of people losing shoes on the interchanges of Columbus.
Only missing one more season of Scrubs. Laurie got season four of Alias from Lutes as a gift so her collection is complete.
I've narrowed my eating needs down to five meals. If I could eat these five things all the time I'd be a happy man. Pizza, chicken fingers, cheeseburgers, tuna subs, and egg Mcmuffins.
I have decided to grow the hair. I don't care what it will cost me in career. I'm not saying I'll keep it forever, but it feels more like me when I have my hair long. I'll cut it eventually and donate it to locks of love.
We are officially not sure what we're having. We think it's a girl based on the gyno's guess but...we won't know until the thing pops out.
I learned yesterday that I'm not as good a friend as I think I am. I was sort of complaining to a friend about another friend who didn't make it to small group but that I guess I understood cause he was hanging with his mother who is convalescing. He replied that she had just been in the emergency room the previous night and that he had been there with him. So I extrapolated there had been some kind of communication between them. Now I would never say I was a better friend to that guy then he was but I never knew how far back I was until that moment. I yearn for that kind of friendship. I try to be that kind of friend. But I am far off.

It's more than a feeling

So I killed a fly the other day. Slapped it down out of midair. It reminded me of my days at French Camp. Yeah, French Camp. Lutes and I went and used to play ping-pong on our lunch breaks. There, we would be bombarded by hornets. So I took it upon myself to go on the attack. I considered it an insult that they would come after me so I got really aggressive with them. That summer I think I ended the life of at least 30 yellow jackets. I felt like the brave little tailor. Seven in one blow. I really hate insects. I mean truly loathe them. I will leave an outdoor party just to get away from them. I blame my parents cause we lived in mosquito rich country and did a lot of outdoor activities, which as a kid, I didn't have the choice of doing or not doing.
I was thinking about flatulence. Emma calls them toots. Apparently the universally accepted word fart is not allowed at daycare. So anyway, she has this little fart machine that makes sounds and names the different farts. It does this very inaccurately in my humble opinion and I wondered if I could do better. Here goes: The groaner, The splatter, the lady fart(completely silent), the puppy dog(escapes and surprises you), the tuba, the machine gun, and the grunt(includes a push of some kind.)
I've come to realize that most of the people on sports talk radio are blowhards. They make these outrageous statements and then don't feel the responsibility to back it up. They claim to speak for the fan and just raise a ruckus for themselves. I guarantee you hardly any thinking adults care about what they have to say. Which says just as much about us as them I guess.
It was suggested I start writing about my love list and it got me to thinking about it's origins. I was intending to start a list of things that I hated or made me mad or pissed me off. But one of my friends chided me into staying positive and creating a list of things that I loved or made me happy. It almost climbed to a thousand items before I stopped. The list on the blog is in no way comprehensive.
Canada seems so close. I look forward to seeing most of you. And ignoring all the rest.

Marvin Milquetoast and other things Jon Steppe taught me

I'm a big fan of maxims; Those little words of wisdom in short sentence form. I've probably not taken to habit as many as I'd like but they intrigue me. I always thought I'd be very good at creating my own but it seems you can't just start using them and hope people pick up on them. You either have to have a captive audience or have them immortalized in print or audio media. This is not to say I just have 50 one liners on the tip of my tongue. Quite the opposite. I can never be as clever as I want to when called upon and my recall of funny stories is lacking.
No, I'm really more of a seat of my pants kind of guy. Even in public speaking I always wanted to veer off at the risk of losing my place in a much better constructed train of thought. And so I wonder if I'll be given the opportunity to show that passion or mild giftedness.
The more logical assumption is that I'm going to have to make my own luck. I need to be pro-active in my attempt to have my thoughts and words considered on a grander stage. It's been suggested to me that I have a certain je-ne-sais-quois. A kind of style of conversing that some people appreciate. This week alone I've been told to find an outlet for my "talents". (The true artist always thinks he has none.)
Truthfully, I've come across many writers (or at least bloggers) who I think should find a way to organize their thoughts into a bound edition of some sort. And to be counted among them, at least by some, is humbling.
I guess the hard part is subject matter that can perfectly or adequately goad the words into existence. I look forward to what makes me want to put pen to page or digit to keys. Your help as always is greatly appreciated. Topics for scrutiny can be submitted here or on my facebook page. And in the immortal words of Bartles and James, "Thank you for your support".

Need I say more?

There was a commercial for Axe shampoo that quoted a stat saying 85% of women find dandruff a turn-off. 85%?What, the other fifteen percent are into it? Or not that turned off? Apparently there is a similar percent of women not turned off by B.O., halitosis, front-ass, nose hair, and stupidity. Cause let me tell ya, there are some gross idiots out there. And a lot of women dating them.
I paid $5.16 for 3 pieces of chocolate tonight. Godiva chocolate. I'd feel bad but it's almost worth it. I could have bought 2 pounds of M&M's however. Life's about trade-offs. I love going to stay at the Horners cause they appreciate food as much as I do. We always eat great.
I was reminded of a fun series of commercials while listening to the radio. Nike had the "Fun Police" with Gary Payton and Kevin Garnett. Always guest starring some other famous players, past or present. Leon's Furniture used to have these Ho Ho Hold the payment commercials that always made me laugh out loud too.
I always think of random crap when I'm watching TV or listening to the radio that I wish I could discuss with someone. My wife wouldn't really care and I can't blame her. Having a wingman to talk to would be awesome though.
Some fun facts about me:
I am terrible at video games.
I have two screws in my right hip. Big ones.
I've been in my local paper at least 6 times. Can you say that?
I had the highest average of any male in the sixth grade of my elementary school.
Both my siblings were the valedictorians at Bethany.
I have over a hundred Ben and Jerry's pints in my collection.
I don't wear a watch.
I have 22 mix CD's and love making them.
I've never seen The Wizard of Oz.
I've made almost $5000 selling cookies from home.

Bend with your knees

Emma has discovered that daddy has a front uhh...appendage. She calls it my tail. Now for all of you out there who think I parade around naked just suppress that gag reflex. She tries to see it, sometimes after peeing or getting out of the shower. There is no gratuitous nudity in the Hurd household.
We just bought a mini-van. Not quite sure how I feel about that. It's nice and all but it's a mini-van man.
I got my second ticket the other week. I was apparently riding the guy in front of me in rainy weather. A two-fer of misdeeds. My first came in college when I ran a red light I thought was green. Never get tired of remembering that.
Four weeks in a row of great movies coming out. Though if history is any indication I'll see maybe one in theaters. Wolverine, Star Trek, Angels and Demons, Terminator Salvation, all worth seeing but I'm really holding out for Harry Potter. Those idiots at the studio have made me wait for nine friggin months!
Had a fun night with my buddy Scott last night. Caught up, laughed, shopped, swore, and cruised in his sweet Mustang.
I'm considering getting a tattoo. The rub is that I hate needles. Hate. Have you ever noticed that the feeling you get when you release a huge pee is similar to that of sexual release? Maybe it's just me. Sorry to the unmarrieds out there who can't relate.
Have you ever been behind someone at a fast food restaurant and they've been standing in line for like five minutes and they get up their and they act like they've never seen the menu before? "Ummmm, I'll have..." Grrr.
Positives: anniversary plans, Toyota engines, moms
Negatives: fridge repairs, wet little girl, the price of gold

Let the wookie win

We just had our Easter services at the church and to my chagrin, there was in three installments, flowery, weaving, womanly interpretive dance. I happen to know at least three guys who cringe every time this happens. I want to start writing sermons again. Not only to get back in the word but to flex that skill for prospective employers.
Laurie and I as of right now will be parents again. We go to the ob today at one for the first sonogram.
We're getting a new car later this week. I need a ride to get to work so Laurie doesn't have to drop me off all the time and it'll free me up to look for work during the days. We are going to get a sweet deal because I work for a dealership now.
We are flying up to Bangor and then renting a car on June 30th. Ahhhh...a week in Canada. I look forward to friends, family and familiarity. I would move there in a second but Laurie has some reservations. For instance, it snowed this weekend in NB. Here it was a balmy 55 degrees. The uncertainty of daycare, proximity to grandparents, and me giving up my green card, all good reasons to stay here. Plus there's my ever evolving job search. (sigh)

The Ides of March

I'd love to be a radio host. I just heard from Jeff Fuller that he gets to participate in a late night sports radio program. I almost crapped with envy. I've always been, for better or worse, a commentator. My opinion comes out on way too many things. And that forum seems to be one of the only left where you get to be free with what you say. In fact most of the guys who do it are kind of jerks.(Think: Colin Cowherd, Rush Limbaugh)
I'm flipping between the college basketball sweet sixteen and my Columbus Blue Jackets throttling the Calgary Flames.(5-0 and counting)
I'm the heaviest I've ever been in my life and it's got to stop. Laurie and I started an eating plan and I've actually gained weight! But you know what, I'm actually happy with myself. Sure I'd love to shrink the old belly and eliminate the jiggle but if it happens agonizingly slowly I can live with that.
I've got a new job being the runner for a used car dealership. It's fun. Driving like a hundred miles a day. Learning all about Columbus. Plus it may help us land a new car at a discounted price.
Its that time of year again. When I get turned down for jobs all across the denomination for lack of experience. Well, that and my lack of preferred area of service. I just really don't know what I want to do, because I haven't done anything.
I love getting together with friends. I'm a board game junkie and I really never get to do it that much. This Saturday we're going to have pizza and then a cake party. I'm going to make Morgan Macpherson's Skor Cake. Mmmmmm.
I'm growing my hair back out. Maybe not shoulder-length, but I've determined that I enjoy my look with a shaggy do. It suits who I am inside.
I just learned from my Mom that my adopted name was Nicholas Lee Fredericksen. I like Jon better.
Positives: Emma picking out my shirts, beef tenderloin, date with the wife.
Negatives: Man boobs, shoulder pain, missing ball hockey.

Raindrops on roses....

In the spirit of Jon Stephens who does not read this blog,
These are a few of my favorite things.
"Jesus Freak" by DC talk. One of the few albums that I can say impacted me. I was just entering college and these formerly dance/hip-hop artists, who I did not like, blew Christian music up.
"The Naked Gun". Still one of the funniest movies, start to finish.
The "Bruno and Boots" books by Gordon Korman.
Hot showers on cold days.
Jeans that have been worn 5 days in a row.
The book of Romans. So many questions and conundrums.
Lots of scoring in sports.
Black and white photos.
Cadbury milk chocolate.
Making mix cds.
New Flavors from Ben and Jerry's
Listening to my daughter talk
Quilts
Rubbing the dogs heads on my lap after they've had their showers
Watching hockey games live.
Sub weeks. For the uninformed, that's when I eat tuna subs three meals a day for a week.
Fantasy football. I also hate it depending on the week.
The X-Men movies. Almost perfect.
Planning vacations.
Taking vacations.
Chicken tenders from Roosters.
My ball glove.
"Scrubs"
Catching the entire season of Lost with no repeats.

Is it me or......?

My basketball team has lost 14 straight games dating back 3 years. The softball team I played for last year? We didn't win a game either. I used to think I was the reason, but there are a lot of guys on those teams that are not me. Guys with talent.
Losing is one of those things that gets to you. Not in an upfront way but it has a way of staying with you and impacting you whether or not you know it. Like today at work, we got our butts chewed out for not selling more. In a recession. And it happens like twice a month. And I'd do something else but I'm lucky to have a job. There's really nothing else. Or if there is I don't know how to find it.
Emma has these moments where she'll randomly hit me. I'll tell her to stop, warn her of the consequences and then enact her punishment. Then she freaks and wants her Mom. Ten minutes later she's my best bud.
I can't let the dogs drink cold water. They've been barfing after walks when they come in and fill up on water. Thank God for laminate flooring.
I got told to "hold on" at a fast food joint the other day. I was in the drive thru and rolled up to the speaker where I was told to "Hold on". Not "be right with you" or "could you wait a moment please" but a sigh and frustrated, "Hold on". Serves me right for putting any confidence in the food service industry anymore.
I think I'll pop some corn tonight. We used to have a hot oil popper and melted real butter. It was amazing. Then we switched to a bowl that air popped it. Course now it's all bagged.
Positives: Finally getting baseboard, future steak dinner, DirectTV
Negatives: Missing the lads, chronic back pain, missing Scrubs...again...

New year, same oljonnyhurd

Well, we're down to three people at work now. In case you didn't know I'm a family service professional at a cemetery,(yes it's a real job)and through a series of resignations and firings we are down to a sales staff of three. Which is exactly where we were at when I started. Seven other people have now come and gone in one calendar year. Amazing. It's really all due to everyone hating either the ugly side of the job(sales) or our stubborn, crotchety and downright mean sales manager. Yet she remains employed. Hmmmm....
We are now refinancing our home and hope to save at least 100 bucks a month on our mortgage. Woohoo! Here's to the economy being so bad it sometimes benefits you. Our car just got paid off and now we have cash free to reinstall cable. Down here you have to either get cable or a converter box because TV is going digital.
Can someone tell me why a Big Mac costs $2.99 but a double cheeseburger only costs $1.19 when the only difference is lettuce and an extra piece of bread? I'm paying for novelty aren't I? Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
My family is split over two countries and none of us is really even that near each other. My parents have to drive 2 and 1/2 hours just to see my sister while my brother is a day from me. And by day I mean 24 hours. It kind of sucks cause all your vacation time is spent either traveling or visiting. But we push on.
It was -9 F here this morning. A five year low. My mustache froze. Our neighbor was sweet enough to snow blow our walk and driveway cause he loves using it. (the blower not our driveway)
Emma continues to be the prettiest, smartest kid in our house. She got a few new videos for Christmas and watches them ad nauseum. But I've taught her to ask for Scrubs or Diners, Drive-ins and Dives as well.("I'm no Superman")
I created a new dessert on a friend's suggestion. Nutter Butter Cheesecake is a hit! The cookie business remains underwhelming. The spirit is willing but demand is weak.
Skyline chili tonight, or maybe dinner out with our friends the Loscherts. Laurie owes me a steak.
I've removed myself from all positions of leadership in the church because every time I get involved, something happens that I can't stomach. And believe it or not, the best way to overcome a problem is not be part of the solution. That only works if you are taken seriously as a leader in the first place. Which I clearly am not. I've attempted to share a bunch of ideas with different staff members and influential congregants only to be ignored or told to wait. Either way, I'm through trying to help a group of people who clearly don't want my brand of assistance. I still hold to the slimmest of hopes that God will put my fertile brain and bold spirit to good use somewhere but the ball's in his court now.
A quick farewell to AJ's blog. I hope his time management becomes more effective and he can return. His insightfulness will be missed.
And finally, an undoubtedly innappropriate shout-out to all the ladies out there who use the word "panties" to describe their unmentionables. I don't know why but it's so much sexier than "underwear". (I guess it's cause guys wear underwear.)

Craptastic!

I may be the most disgusting guy around but I feel like I'm not alone. I have peed on the back of my pants while sitting on the toilet at school. Sometimes when I cough really hard something will fly out the back of my throat. I pick my nose and fling my boogers, in a really secret way. And most disgusting of all, if I don't get enough toilet paper, I can get poo on my hand by accident. Gross, gross, gross.
So for all of you out there who are closet nasties, the time has come to stand and confess. Amnesty has been granted here at Breastmilk Ice Cream.

Thanks a lot

This is a list of things I am thankful for in no particular order and for no special reason.

I'm thankful I have three toilets in my house. Especially this moment.
I'm thankful for credit cards.
I'm thankful for second chances.....and third and fourth and......
I'm thankful my parents are still married.
I'm thankful I was brought up right.
I'm thankful I went to Bethany Bible College and built the relationships I have.
I'm thankful for a bunch of knuckleheads I call my small group.
I'm thankful for American cheese slices.
I'm thankful for a beautiful 2 year old.
I'm thankful for a beautiful 30 year old.
I'm thankful I can still walk without pain.(some days)
I'm thankful for unlimited opportunity.
I'm thankful for the humble potato.
I'm thankful for a crappy job.(cause it's a job)
I'm thankful there is potential for more.
I'm thankful for trivia.
I'm thankful for free internet.
I'm thankful for generous parents and in-laws.
I'm thankful for a family free from strife.(cause not everyone can say that)
I'm thankful for hand moisturizer.
I'm thankful for this moment and the next.
I'm thankful I can read about my Lord anytime I'm motivated enough to do it.
I'm thankful he doesn't keep score.
I'm thankful you took the time to read this.

Leave of Absence

Sorry folks. I've been neglecting you and that's just not fair. (actually by the lack of comment on my lack of blogging it lets me know how little my "frivolous entertainment" has been missed.)
I have, though, good reasons for most of my non blogging.
1. I just wasn't inspired and there's nothing worse than uninspired writing.(see Star Wars 1-3)
2. I went on a forty day fast of the Internet.
3. Immediately following the fast, we went on a week long cruise. (This is not a complaint merely an excuse.)
But now awash in seawater and having gained a fresh perspective on the written word and it's importance in culture, I want to blog again. I shall aspire anew to bring you the hard hitting, funny and self revelatory drivel you've come to know and love. Consider that a threat.

So what you're saying is....

I smoked a Dominican cigar a couple of weeks ago. Smoked the whole thing, right down to the end. It made me feel weird. Like I was nauseous and broke into a cold sweat. That and the fact you taste it for a day after affirms my commitment to smoke only two a year, if that.
I feel as though I am king of the double entendre. Like if there is a joke to be made about the second meaning of something, my brain automatically leaps there and I'll chuckle to myself.
I've been a bit on edge the last few days and I can really pinpoint why. Not angry or mean just touchy. I try to be fairly happy go lucky but this week....I think I have some deeper things to work through.
It smells like fire outside. Like a wood burning fire. I love it when something I experience helps me relive a memory. The other day a friend of mine pulled out a roll of Certs. You remember... the little mints with "retsin" to help freshen breath. Well my Uncle Jim used to bring us rolls of those every time he visited. I don't even know where you get them these days. Anyone else got a story like that? Something so small yet so powerfully entrenched in your memory?
I think I lost a gift from my Mom today. We had purchased the first three Harry Potter books in a 3-pack and got home and forgot about them. Well later in the day we found a six pack at another store. So we decided to take the other pack back the next day to get the money back. Come to find out we couldn't locate the books. Best as we can recollect they never actually made it inside the car. I believe in strapping my daughter in the car I forgot them on the roof and drove away. Thank God it wasn't the other way around. Emma would be pissed. Still it's just another example of my carelessness either getting me hurt or costing me money. If I could trade for someone else's life for just a few days it would be a real relief.
The nights are getting cooler here. I thoroughly enjoy fall and it can't get here quick enough for my tastes. Football, sweatshirts and cool breezes. Ahhhh.

Positives: getting 6 Harry books, smoked meats, two months til the cruise
Negatives: losing 3 Harry books, overly fatty meats, two months til the cruise

some things to consider

Have you ever looked at pictures of yourself with your eyes closed? I always used to be concerned about how I looked. Never having seen myself until about a week ago. I don't get many pictures taken of me while I sleep. Not a strange as I thought it would be.
Blue raspberry is an entirely man-made flavor. Nowhere in nature is there a raspberry that is blue.
Squirrel peanut butter, for some reason, did away with the peanut on the top of their product. I bought it not only for the flavor, but because it was the one with the peanut on top.
Why do diet products, which contain sweetener 100 times more powerful than sugar, taste so bad? Like they need a teaspoon of sugar.
The average American consumes 8 gallons of ice cream a year. Vanilla is still the most popular flavor. (A claim I do not believe)
I went to a beautiful home for a party yesterday and it was ten times nicer than ours. But I was comforted by the fact that their paint job looked just as amateur as our own.
Harry Potter was on the cover of Entertainment Weekly for their fall movie preview. Only the day before Warner Brothers announced they are moving the movie to July 2009. Can anyone get it together? I'm just saying. Plus it sucks having to wait a whole eight months more.
My parents visit in three weeks. They've seen Emma twice so far. I'm going to have to train her with a picture to be able to identify them.
Xmas list: Harry Potter books in paperback. New shirts. New ties.

I'm a loser baby....so why don't you kill me

I often wonder why things happen. Coincidence, fate, or a spiritual set of reward and punishment. All these reasons come together to color and cloud the way I look at my circumstances. I have, at different times, like everyone else, done the wrong thing when I should have done the right thing. Does my neglect of my own knowledge of right and wrong come back and bite me in the ass?
I tend to believe there are consequences for our actions. But are there, in this life, penalties for choosing to sin? It has been my experience that when I fall short there is an almost immediate circumstance or thing that happens. Is this all in my head? I'm a guy who tends to ask forgiveness, albeit genuinely and wholeheartedly, a long time after my actions, and I can't help but wonder if God does actively "discipline those he loves" in the meantime.
Case in point: I got lost on the way back from a movie and it took us twenty five extra minutes of driving. Then the next day Laurie discovers that she has made a mistake in booking our flights to get to Florida to take our cruise. The error will cost us at least $360. Now the conspiracist in me would say that those events in proximity to my bad choice would be quite suspect. But the normal side of me wants to chalk it up to those things happen. And I'm not really sure what to do with the spiritual side. I deserve to be reprimanded if I've screwed up and am blatantly disobedient. But is that in fact what's happening? Does God have a vested interest in correcting my behavior that manifests itself through apparent bad luck? We often chalk up good things happening in our lives to his blessing but is it so out there to consider that he still curses those who misrepresent him by their actions?
I believe the God of the NT is also the God of the Old, and while there is a new covenant he won't be mocked forever. When I choose to sin in the face of his love and sacrifice maybe I need a good kick in the head every once in a while.
To me though, the greater question has to do with my vocation. I want to work in a church full time and sometimes I feel my screw-ups jeopardize that ambition. Now I'm not naive enough to believe that pastors don't sin or that there aren't pastors in positions that are actively sinning. So am I off base in wondering why I am less worthy than they are to work full time for the kingdom? I'm an honest guy and that gets me into trouble sometimes. I admit when I fall short, I don't take credit for abilities I may or may not have and I get into uneasy territory when I publicly(as public as this blog is) discuss issues like this that may have details about my personal spiritual journey. But I never want to lose this penchant for self evaluation and this questioning spirit. And I want to share these things with others so they can look inwardly and with a sigh of relief say "Thank God I'm not the only one".
(Thanks to Beck for the lyrical title)

What's up

I have a friend who told me a story Wednesday night. When he was about fifteen, he had a weird feeling one night and his father told him to check himself over. He found (brace yourself) a tick in his wiener. So his Dad walks in to the bathroom with a lit match, which apparently will make a tick back out of the skin. Needless to say he freaked. The other guy we were with was cringing as much as I was when the story was told. Can you friggin' imagine?
We were at the home of friends tonight and they have a dog that will go into the garden and eat their tomatoes. He'll go in and pick just the right one, mostly green with just a touch of red.
I love a good thunderstorm. We were hoping for one tonight. It's great for just sitting and watching and listening. Tonight we had chicken that had been marinated for 3 days, fresh picked corn that was beyond sweet and tender, and a five layer chocolate desert. Oh and bread and butter. Sigh. I love food.

Positives: Homemade peach jam, next Wednesday, the bloggosphere
Negatives: being cableless, no volume control, sweating at night

Strange but true

This is going to sound weird to all the girls but when I pee I pee to one side. I don't know if this happens to all guys or even women but I know it is real to me. Plus sometimes my pee will shoot into two streams. I'm like some kind of mutant pee-er.
The next big project we are going to undertake, besides re-painting every room in the house, is new flooring. Probably fake hardwood. Then we work on replacing the lawn.
I bought like nine new T-shirts on vacation. For the first time, I like every shirt in my dresser.
Laurie and I picked peaches off the tree in Virginia and made jam the following week. It is de-friggin-licious. Made a new cookie for a neighbor's birthday yesterday. Chocolate with raspberry jam. I'm not quite the domestic goddess that Kristi Benson is but....
Last night after an hour long search I finally found a song I'd been looking for for well over half a year. It was in an episode of "Bones" at the end. Turns out it was a song called "Precious" by Depeche Mode.


Positives: blogging, movies in theaters, 5 dollar large pepperoni
Negatives: unreliable phone service, wonky back, outstanding contracts

Almost Compelling Storytelling

I care about stupid stuff sometimes. And what I mean by that is I care about stuff that doesn't really matter a little more than it deserves. Entertainment Weekly just released its 1000th issue and it ranks the top 100 "new classics" in a bunch of categories. In the TV category it didn't rank "Cheers" as one of the best shows on TV in the last 25 years. Now I don't know why, but it's very important to me to write to them and tell them they're wrong. I even got angry at a couple of the shows they ranked in the top 100. (Of course who wouldn't be pissed at seeing "Friday Night Lights" on anybodies favorites list.) It makes me wonder what the standard could possibly have been.
Laurie and I had a fight last night and it was over the same thing we always fight about: money, and the way it is spent. We actually have more disposable income than we realize, it's just that I spend it in 5 dollar increments 15 times a month and Laurie spends it in larger increments once every 3 months. Basically tuna subs vs. gym memberships. Anyway we had a stern disagreement last night and I walked out of the room with a "I'll see you in the morning", intending to sleep on the couch. Well, Laurie didn't know this, so my angry exit sounded like a polite farewell. I guess I need to learn to communicate my huffiness better. I told her this in the morning and she had a good laugh.
I'm at the stage of parenthood where it's OK for me to take care of other people's kids when we're all together. If they want to go off with my kid or they want to hang with me then it's quite all right with the other parents in the neighborhood. It's amazing, the honor bequeathed with siring a child.
I find it strange that as a future possible job would take us out of state we are connecting with more of our neighbors. As I said this has a lot to do with having a child.
I've been pondering life with constant back pain and the outlook isn't good. I'm no stranger to injuries and this is just one more to add to the list but all my others don't have the possibility for long term debilitation. I guess it's not going to be heart disease that has me thinking about weight loss for my health.
We head to Virginia in 5 days and I can't wait. First time on vacation in 11 months. Laurie's parents are especially willing to give us time to ourselves as it gives them more time with their only grandchild.
I'm now up to 21 mixes and it would be more if not for the limitations of our laptop. I can't download songs that require itunes plus. Bummer.
Positives: a thousand dollar bonus if I can make it through July, softball tonight, four free condoms.
Negatives: the return of the boss, Emma pinching my wiener, sandal footprints on a clean floor.

Blissfully Wistful

It's amazing to think of where my friends are now. I went to college roughly 13 years ago, and there are so many of my classmates who have actually seen the world. Or at least a far-reaching corner of it. I'm humbled that God led us to Columbus, OH, a city of a little over a million people counting surrounding areas. But to think that I have acquaintances in the far corners of the globe is awe-inspiring. Further proving the work of the Lord is not restricted by borders.
Scott Landry and his wife Amy are serving in Yellowknife, Northwest Territories. Robin White is currently in Japan. Andrew and Amy Donovan are in New Zealand. Caleb Lapointe now lives in Australia. One of my classmates is in one of the former Soviet States ministering in secret.
As I take a possible step into full-time ministry it makes me want to compare my own life and accomplishments with their own. That is a temptation that they would tell me to avoid though. God does not measure how far you've gone just how far you've come. And I don't plan on jogging in place.

Twenty five things I'd like to try

Sky-diving, a truffle(the real kind), acting, first class, riding in a limo, writing a book, chocolate liqueur, building a treehouse, growing a long beard, boxing, professional taster, a month long vacation, gambling in Vegas, downhill skiing, beef tenderloin, playing Santa, deep frying a turkey, a monopoly marathon, going on Jeopardy, baking professionally, Hawaiian Shave Ice at Matsumoto's Grocery, working for Ben and Jerry's, getting a massage, playing a round of golf, pastoring. Oh, and disc jockeying at a radio station.

Pride and Joy

Just a few photos of the peach.

And now: a word from our sponsor...

I really enjoy many things. I make use of them, like the advertising, would even recommend them to others. I make no bones about being unabashedly geeky when it comes to certain things. Product loyalty is one of them. Here is an non-comprehensive list in no particular order.
Lucky Charms
Gain
Old Navy
Dove Ice Cream Bars
Crest
Nike
Sports Illustrated
The Food Network
ESPN
Victoria's Secret
American Eagle
Kraft
Chik-Fil-A
Coke
Speed Stick
Scotch Brand Tape
Now an overdue shout out to the ladies. In my short time on this earth, I've had the pleasure of meeting, living with and befriending some great ladies. With a nod to Mother's Day, I'd like to tell of some women who've shaped my life. My birth mother, whoever you are: Thanks for not aborting me and for placing me with a family who loved me. Not everyone can say that. To my real mother: Thanks for loving me as much as those from your womb(even more it could be argued). To my sister: Thanks for being patient with me as I grew into someone who learned to respect and appreciate who you are. To my former girlfriends: Thanks for guiding me towards adulthood and teaching me a little about true love. To my present female friends: Thanks for your listening ears, your friendships and for sharing your fellas with me. To my wife: Thanks for taking this long, lovely walk hand in hand. And to my daughter: Thank you for allowing me to see the heart and face of God.
I love all of you so much.

Jon

You want fries with that?

Lately I've been noticing that I only seem to gain and lose weight in two places. My face and my tummy. Weird, cause growing up it was my waist and hips. I guess I should be grateful that I don't have to buy new pants anymore just shirts. Laurie wants me to cut back and not let myself get big, big. That's fair.
Last Saturday I was feeling peckish. And I remembered that we just got a Little Caesar's about a mile from us. So I went there about 10pm and discovered I was not the only one who was hungry. Five bucks got you a hot fresh Large pepperoni. Awesome. I had five slices. And three the next day.
Why is it that onion rings are the white gold of the fast food industry? I swear there isn't one menu where they cost the same as fries. Aren't onions even cheaper than potatoes? Why do you have to upgrade? Why isn't it an even trade? C'mon people, stand up and say NO MORE!
Now it's time to heap praise on someone I know.
Jon Stephens is the best storyteller I've ever met. He can make the mundane uproarious. I salute you man. For your upbeat spirit and your can do attitude. Though you do suck a little for never calling.

Information Superhighway

I used to think I was allergic to the sun. Every time I would look up I sneezed so I just figured....I still can't explain that phenomenon. It happens to the kid too.
Driving doesn't really relax me. I get uptight because I try to get into the other drivers' heads. Like, why would they be braking every thirty seconds? Why are they going the school zone speed limit when school is not in session? Why are they not going on the green light?
Have you ever really poured Johnson's Baby Shampoo into your eyes? Tearless my ass. It stings.
Why is it that lunch meats aren't good on the second day but spaghetti is?
I paid 20 bucks for 8 razor blades yesterday. Man did I go into the wrong business.
I haven't taken a bath in like ten years. I should.
This week Laurie is going to a conference in Atlanta and I have Emma all to myself for like four days. Scary. She doesn't sleep as well for me but she eats better so I guess we'll have a chubby, bleary-eyed little girl when she returns home. I tend to splurge when Laurie isn't around. Sometimes it's a movie, or eating out...who am I kidding, it's always eating out.
I wish I could find the perfect T-shirt. I find them here and there but I usually can't go back and buy like twenty of them. I'd like to pitch about half my stock right now. Too short or too tight. Or I could lose ten pounds.
Now it's time to heap praise on someone I know.
Kelly Thomas: write a book already! Your prose is touching, human and heartfelt. That spells blockbuster where I'm from. Just as long as I'm in the "Special thanks to" notes.
Positives: a great church, a dog bed full of balls and two laughing babies, tender pork loin
Negatives: wandering in all forms, God's timing, dry clean only pants

The power of pie

I went out to a diner tonight. It's located in an old gas station and has that small town feel that every diner should. Well, "Henry's" is known for its pie and my friend Jon called the diner in advance to make sure we would get a piece. Upon arrival we were asked by the waitress if we would be willing to give up our slices. There were two men, a father and son, who were from Pennsylvania. They had visited "Henry's" 18 years earlier and had a piece of pie. Remembering how good it was they wanted to stop again and have a slice. But it turned out they had sold every piece, save those reserved for us. Well hearing their plight, how could we refuse? The cool thing was the guys had been sitting there just chatting with the locals for about 20 minutes. Had they left even a minute earlier, our paths would not have crossed and we never would have had the chance to show that kindness. The best part was how appreciative the men were. It really was the best pie they'd ever had.
We really had a funny waitress too. They were out of two of the entrees we ordered, so when Tim and I reordered, we were only allowed to order something that met her standards. Also Evan got labeled a wimp for not ordering true diner food. She was a hoot. Just the lady to deal with a bunch of wise asses like us.
Life is interesting right now. Em is regressing in the sleep area again. Work is a bitter grind. And I'm being shut out on the pastoral job search, again.
Did you ever have a pee that felt like it would never end? It's a weird sensation.
Positives: free subs, first pre-need sale, grocery shopping
Negatives: managerial oversight, garlic breath, far away "lighters"

Menudo

Voluminous! There, I finally remembered one. Snowflake. Good also.
AJ has been giving me bits and pieces of song lyrics and I have to try to finish them. I read a couple of years ago that the British voted on the all-time best song lyric. And the winner was "One life, with each other, sisters, brothers", from "one" by U2.
My personal favorite comes from a song by Third Day called "I don't know".

"I don't know what I could say, or would it matter anyway? Cause I don't know how you could still forgive me. For all that I have put you through, is there anything that I can do? I would give my life to find your mercy. What will it take until you forgive me? Or Lord will I find that you have already. I don't know."

I feel bad when I have to discipline. Whether it's my dogs or my daughter, I don't enjoy it in the least. This realization offers me insight into the heart of God. I am a father. God is my father. The bible says the lord disciplines those he loves, like a father disciplines his child. Well, if I feel as bad as I do and I'm not even close to being able to love as God does, how much more does my "Dad" agonize over my course corrections, my discipline?
Tomorrow I get to give, on behalf of my small group, a trunkload of groceries to a woman who needs it. Out of work, three kids. It feels right, you know? Helping out, I mean. Doing the work of the church. I'm blessed to hang with these broken, striving, flawed, sainted brothers.
Positives: Free milkshake #2, sending out resumes, Jon and Joyce Myers
Negatives: Management, the glut of good TV on Thursday nights, lack of experience

Don't patronize me

Funny isn't it? Patronage is a good thing, but patronizing is bad.
I like words: How they sound, and sometimes perfectly represent what they are.
Laurie likes the word llama cause it's a double L. And effervescent. She hates ornery, facetious and phenomenal. I like sizzle, drummer and jerk. I hate tool, awesome and the phrase "hedge of protection".
Brilliant is underused. I met a guy from Ireland last night and he described the parents of his girlfriend as "brilliant". Funny, eh? I like fifties words like neat and swell and keen and golly gee whiz.
Fart is a fun word. It's playfully crass. Like crap. No one says crap better than my friend Jon. It's always preceded by the word "Awww".
The written word is better than the spoken word, I believe. I appreciate it more when I see words put together in a pleasant or smart way. I can appreciate fine oratory but I bow to good writing. I aspire to it. I respect when someone chooses their words carefully to more accurately and descriptively convey what they've experienced. It makes me want to become a student of language.
I never remember all my favorite words when I want to so the time has come to defer to you, the reader and let you opine on your favorite words or phrases. Hopefully I'll remember mine someday soon.

Thank God I'm not lactose intolerant

Today was a good day.
OK, this may not come as a surprise to many of you, but I'm a food geek. I like trying food. I like learning about food. I like shows about food. I kind of revel in it. I especially appreciate it when it's free.
This afternoon I was driving by the local Chik fil A and saw on their sign that on April 2nd you could win shakes for a year at 5pm. What could it hurt to stop inside? I figured it was some drawing that I'd never win but what the heck. Turns out all you had to do was get in line, get a ticket and stay on the premises until 5. The first one hundred people to get their ticket got a punch card good for 52 free milkshakes or one per week.
Well, I called Laurie and it didn't take much convincing to get her over there. An hour and a half later we were holding the first of our 52 shakes. I don't know why, but life seemed better because I held that card. Who knew that one stop could totally affect the rest of my year?
Now if only this specter of good fortune would turn its gaze upon my career. Can't be greedy I guess.
Positives: Emma's grins, appointments, free trips to Cracker Barrel
Negatives: Cutting nails too short, boogers, mornings beginning before 6am

Jeckyl and Hyde

I don't normally recommend R-rated material. But I've got to say that "Regular Everyday Normal Guy" on funnyordie.com is one of the funniest things I've ever heard. Sorry, but it's true. I've learned over the course of my years that people who wouldn't laugh at South Park are worthy of admiration but they're not as fun to be around.
My daughter hit me in the nose with the DVD remote yesterday and drew blood. Laurie laughed so hard she cried. Which brings up an interesting question. Why is it so funny when awkwardly painful things happen to people? Who doesn't smirk or downright guffaw when some guy takes a ball to the groin?
I miss my hair sometimes. I like the way it looked long.
I think it's funny that when I'm out in public I always put toilet paper on the seat before going. Yet when I'm in someone's house, I do not. It doesn't even occur to me in my own house even if we've had company. Really, are public toilets that much dirtier? Peace of mind is a funny thing.
One good thing about my new job is that I'm the designated food fetcher on call nights. I've been to like five different places now.

In closing, "This is my prayer for you: that your love will grow more and more; that you will have knowledge and understanding with your love; that you will see the difference between good and bad and will choose the good; that you will be pure and without wrong for the coming of Christ; that you will do many good things with the help of Christ to bring glory and praise to God."

The results show

Well here is the answer to question number 1. Nope. It ran out of absorption at the 2/3 mark.
Experiment #2
How long can I go without complaining? I saw this on CBS This Morning. A pastor had challenged his congregants to go 3 weeks without complaining. If they made it they got a certificate of happiness. We shall see.
I long to do something meaningful, or that I can recognize as meaningful. I may insert myself into the worship arts here, for as long as we are here, or as long as I can stand it.
Positives: "Momma", spring, the merciful end to my basketball season.
(*no negatives, for three weeks at least)

Grow Up!

My new blog series is going to be an unofficial set of experiments.

Experiment #1 Will a size 3 huggies diaper hold a normal sized adult pee. Results to follow.
By the way, I was watching my daughter walk and I noticed she kind of swings her legs from side to side like swiveling instead of walking. Also her arms stay raised almost even with her head. Is this so she will not fall? I'm not sure but it always makes her seem happier when she waddles around. That might be experiment #2. How would society react to seeing a grown man walk around like that? I have no shame, just so you know.
I'm so attracted to my wife right now it's amazing. They say it goes in cycles. I hope this lasts a long time. It feels right and pure to think your wife is sexy. Like you want no one but her. Shout out to VS.
Positives: VS, Free Dinner Date from in-laws, "Messy Spirituality" by Mike Yaconelli
Negatives: general unwellness, double chins, soggy pant cuffs

Wrestling with normalcy

Have you ever been told something about something and then other things actually occur? This, in a nutshell, is my job. There have been quite a few things that have popped up as responsibilities that were not communicated to me when I was hired.
When I was in college, I had a collection that grossed out my roommate. I had a major chest cold every year and I would hoike up phlegm into a bottle and then set it at the head of my bed. I know, I'm disgusting.
I could watch movies every day. I wish I could have 30 bucks a day that I could just blow on movies at theaters. Yep, movies and fast food. Those are my vices. There are starving kids in Africa and poverty is rampant in the world, but I still want my ticket and cheeseburger. It's hard work sucking this much.
I think if I could pick my nationality I would be Swedish. They seem really happy.
Farts are funny. Apparently for guys only but still...funny. They were funny when I was ten and they're funny now. I've spoken with men who are 45 and guess what? Still funny.
I think I have talents that lend themselves to games and not professions. Memory, fact collecting, editing, refined sense of taste. My dream jobs seem to be just that, dreams. DJ, sports editor, tasting expert, humorist. Ah well, guess I'll just have to wait for that perfect job in ministry that Mom keeps praying for.

Wussing out

My friend AJ is having trouble finding locales to hang with unchurched people. My problem is I can't get away from them. Every job I've had, I am surrounded by people. I have never worked in a cubicle. I see humanity all day long. Customer service, working as a marker, and now as a salesperson, I am on display for all to see. Setting myself as an example of what a Christian looks like whether I want to or not.
I actually yearn for the church office life. I want to rub shoulders with my peers. To speak of the things of God daily and at length. I want to fix things, create things, and get things done. Don't get me wrong, I'm as committed as the next guy to evangelism. But I believe that my effectiveness will be increased tenfold when I'm away from the life. I want to live above the fray. I feel a little too much of the world and not in it. Maybe it's because I've had a taste of church life and it tasted so good and maybe I sound like a spoiled brat, but try working in negative situations for a while and see how much fight you've got left in you.
The average person won't understand my point of view cause it's all they've known but my spirit is exhausted from taking so many bodyblows of negativity and corruption. I see hurt manifested all day long. I just want to do some research on the disease for a while instead of treating it.

Ungrateful jerkiness

It occurs to me. Lately, I haven't really publicly let God know what a great job he's done providing for my family.

So here's to you God:
for the generosity of friends and strangers.
for a year of free diapers and wipes.
for parents and in-laws who give as second nature.
for free toys.
for temporary work that payed way too much.
for a budget that let us be flexibly frugal.
for a call from an old friend.
for a job that doesn't seem like the answer.
for a gracious wife.
for a precious daughter.
for reminding me I'm your priceless treasure when I feel utterly worthless.

Ten things you really don't need to know

Apparently, I chew quite vigorously. I'm not sure if this is true, but Laurie says I must produce extra saliva therefore making my mouth sound like a mini car wash.
I like sesame seed buns, a lot. I do not like kaiser rolls, at all.
Pizza Hut makes the best crust in the world. They fry it. If it's stuffed with cheese I'm over the moon.
Every time I tune in to Letterman, it's not funny. If I hear bits on the radio, funniest show ever.
My treat from tax return money this year is a hockey ticket. Now I just need to convince others to waste money with me. The Jackets offense is anemic.
I love seeing movies in theaters. I wish I had an endless amount of cash and free time. I would see almost everything that comes out. Next up: "10,000 BC". Plus "The Happening", M. Night Shamalyan's new flick. Two sets I own, all his movies and all the Potter films. Actually I'm missing his first one. It's called "Wide Awake". If you ever come across it, please send it to me. Really. I mean it.
I cut myself almost every day. It's really annoying.
My wife snores, but only when she's sick. I snore all the time.
I now have 19 mix cd's.
Lost is all new, all year.

Que Pasa?

This is my report on my evening taking care of the baby. First of all, Emma only eats when she wants to and its hardly ever at home. So after thrown food, two slapped hands, and me ignoring her crying, I got her out of her highchair and we were done. Then I tried to feed her a bottle. I say tried because I didn't screw the lid on her bottle tight enough and didn't notice it until she had almost finished. I estimate at least an ounce and a half wound up soaked into her shirt. So I stripped her down and let her run naked. She likes books and makes me read at least five a night to her. So we sat there reading. Milky, half naked and content. My girl and I had a wonderful bath, successfully drank another bottle and went to bed on time and without incident. We'll see how the night goes.
I made a salad tonight and was really disappointed. For some reason, there are certain things to eat that just taste better in restaurants. Or if someone else makes them. I'm a good cook, but I've given up on salads. Burgers are back on the list of things I'll make at home though. They had been off.
The carpet has taken a beating in the last few days. Peanut had the runs twice before we locked her in the kitchen. Then after that passed she threw up the next day. And finally I spilled Gatorade this evening. Sigh.
I have this sense of fear coming over me. We did our taxes and got back much more than we ever have. I keep thinking we must have done them wrong but.....
Week three on the job. I'm severely undertrained but we're severely understaffed, so I've been forced to do things I'm not ready or willing to do. Hopefully I'll get some responses from the 10 letters I'm sending to different districts. But probably not. God likes to humble me.
I hate getting screwed.(Not that I've run into anyone that likes getting screwed) We took our car in to have the brakes done and they're still squealing. I believe they actually did the work and that we have new brakes but they just didn't do it well.
I finally stopped hating people who slow down to go over train tracks. I used to slow down on purpose behind them and then ramp the tracks when I got to them. But now, I just swallow my rage. I have a lot of rage. Not sure why.
Does this ever happen to you? You say something to your spouse and in your head it makes sense but in reality it might not. Or they just seem to be acting really dense. There are some nights when communication with my wife is like verbal gymnastics. She doesn't get what I'm saying or I'll communicate in half thoughts.
Positives: $2500 dollars, free Godiva chocolate, clean dogs.
Negatives: the chaos of office life, 32 inch pants on 30 inch legs, no insulation.

Gezundheit!

I suck at basketball. I love to play it and I enjoy learning things about it, but when it comes to putting the knowledge into action I'm terrible at it. I have a hard time making even open layups. I think I get too excited to have the shot and just blow it. That and I have the technique of a four year old and the grace and coordination of a baby rhino. But boy, can I box out.
Happiness is watching a great TV show with a full belly and all of your girls asleep. Emma's in her crib, Laurie and Butter are on the bed next to me and Peanut is on her dog pillow. Our DVD player went after 7 years and we got a new one. 28 bucks! I got two. The great thing is I'm realizing that our old DVD player sucked and all the DVD's that wouldn't play before are now working perfectly.
The sandwich is the best food on earth. I stand by that statement and invite a healthy debate on the subject. I own a few food documentaries and one of them focuses on singing the praises of the sandwich. For the record, I consider anything between bread to be a sandwich. Peter Beckwith used to put mashed potatoes between slices of white bread. Odd, but a sandwich none the less. My Friends: take this opportunity to think on the humble sandwich and report back on your likes and dislikes.
Topic #6
How do we love God more?
I had a thought last week. I was watching an Andy Stanley video series called "Pause". It's on temptation and I was left pondering my own struggle with sin. My contention was that I don't hate sin enough. It was realized after much debate that the actual issue was that I need to love God more. This being a seminal moment for me, I also had the opportunity to have a conversation with a friend who stoked an old idea of mine from a flicker to a flame. Hopefully an inferno will result. I've got till the end of March to try and raise $2ooo for a steam table and meat to fill the most immediate needs of a local shelter. How do we love God more? Well, obey his commandments and love other people. The rest is just crap.

Woe to thee Meijer and Peter Pan

So has anyone else noticed these seals that they put on your favorite foods? Usually they're like paper with a foil top. They have these tiny little tabs that you're supposed to be able to use to rip off the seal only they never work! They rip only a portion or they rip down the middle. Hmmm.
I just started a new job today and I had to fill out at least fifteen forms. Some of them asked me to say I had read certain materials or understood certain policies even though I hadn't seen anything pertaining to my job yet. The company stresses integrity and yet they were completely fine with me lying for their records. Hmmm.
Remember being on school buses and how they always had to stop at railroad tracks? Well did anyone else's bus ever stop directly on the tracks? Mine always did. Isn't the whole point of doing the stop to not get caught on the tracks in a long vehicle? Hmmm.
Have you ever noticed that as we age we tend to look more like the opposite sex? Men get man-boobs, grow their fingernails out and have no more hair on their legs. Women get flatter, and start growing mustaches. Hmmm.
Positives: Boxers from Old Navy, dinner with friends, paychecks.
Negatives: Holy socks, canceled dinners with friends, No tuna subs.

Pilfered Wisdom

Stole this from Marcia Boland who stole it from someone else. If you don't want to look deep inside at your own motives after reading this, kudos to you. But I bet you're not looking hard enough. What a statement on the condition of our hearts. My savings account looks a lot bigger now.

I was recently sent this little story... It resonated so loudly in my heart! My prayer is that 2008 will be a year where I learn to worry more about the quality of the coffee than the cup I have to drink it from...


"A group of alumni, all highly established in their respective careers, got together for a visit with their old university professor. The conversation soon turned to complaints about the endless stress of work and life in general

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went into the kitchen and soon returned with a large pot of coffee and an eclectic assortment of cups: porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal - some plain, some expensive, some quite exquisite. Quietly he told them to help themselves to some fresh coffee..
When each of his former students had a cup of coffee in hand, the old professor quietly cleared his throat and began to patiently address the small gathering . ''You may have noticed that all of the nicer looking cups were taken up first, leaving behind the plainer and cheaper ones. While it is only natural for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is actually the source of much of your stress-related problems."

He continued .''Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In fact, the cup merely disguises or dresses up what we drink. What each of you really wanted was coffee, not a cup, but you instinctively went for the best cups" ... Then you began eyeing each other's cups .''
''Now consider this: Life is coffee. Jobs, money, and position in society are merely cups. They are just tools to shape and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not truly define nor change the quality of the Life we live. Often, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee that God has provided us ... God brews the coffee, but he does not supply the cups. Enjoy your coffee!''

The happiest people don't have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything they have ...So please remember: Live simply. Love generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly. Leave the Rest to God. And remember - the richest person is not the one who has the most, but the one who needs the least.

You can thank me later

Have you ever noticed people are getting angrier? I know I am..... or was. I tend to wonder about things. Sometimes obsessively. Why is it that people seem to be angrier or at the very least, more comfortable expressing their anger publicly?
I think it's because we don't fight anymore. Used to be you had a disagreement you'd settle it with guns or a sword or a fistfight. Today though, that's seen as uncivilized and is punishable under our laws. It seems that people would be a whole lot calmer if they could just duke it out once in a while. Maybe this is a guy thing. After a physical confrontation guys can be buddies. Like nothing ever happened.
I watched football yesterday and it occurred to me that a lot of coaches can't get their players to do what they need to do or they don't know how. This one team was getting run on and they couldn't stop them. They knew it was coming and still they couldn't do a thing. Sad.
I hate myself enough right now that Laurie and I are going on diets. I'm actually only 20 lbs more than when I married but I'm not in love with the direction my tummy is headed. I'd like to see my wiener when I look down for at least a few more years. My terrible confession? I love everything bad for me. Butter, Mayonnaise, bacon, pop, fried food, cheese and all manner of dairy. It will be hell and I will hate it. Happy freakin' new year.

Sorry, there's just something in my eye....

This will be my eighth consecutive Christmas without seeing members of the Hurd family on or around the actual day. Christmas at my house was always magical. Oh sure we always had to get up early to the sound of Mom swearing at us about doing our part to get things ready. And yes sometimes there were unavoidable catastrophes like Dad breaking the built in counter top cutting board with a rutabaga.(Which in Canada is called a turnip)And inevitably I would always eat too much and get a stomachache and spend the evening lying on the couch wishing for a quick death.
But the holidays are awash with memory for me, real or imagined I don't know. I remember waking at 3am one Christmas and amusing myself with the contents of my overstuffed stocking.(Which had been placed there only a couple hours earlier) I remember unwrapping my biggest gift under the tree on Christmas Eve and being disappointed that it was a winter coat. I remember my first taste of eggnog as Dad and I sat there in our pajamas. I remember filling four trash bags with paper after unwrapping an embarrassing number of gifts. I remember Christmas Eves with a different number of guests each year, depending on who was in town. I remember watering the tree and picking needles off the back of my shirt for hours. I remember the year we got a VCR and a new TV and watching every new station like we had never seen anything so beautiful. My favorite churchy part of Christmas was the Candlelight Carol Sing on the last Sunday before Christmas. We never went to Christmas Eve services so this was the goosebumpy focus on Jesus time for me. It was always so peaceful, loving and moving. I love Christmas Music too. It just seems like better music was written around this holiday than any other. My all-time favorites? O holy night and the little drummer boy. Take a moment this season and think about what you want your kid to be writing about in the years to come. I know I wouldn't trade my Christmas memories for anything. Well, maybe season tickets to the Blue Jackets.

Something for everyone

Here's an interesting tidbit. They must have grown people smaller back in the seventies because I can't fit into the little space they have for the urinals in the old part of our church. I'm serious, there must be like two feet max in between the metal partitions separating the two urinals. I feel like I'm an NFL lineman every time I go to take a pee. I don't know if anyone else has experienced explosive diarrhea in their lifetime but when you do sometimes you can, through no fault of your own, cause errant turd to get on areas of your toilet you would never expect to find poo. This is disturbing because you can go a few days without discovering it. Then you're embarrassed for some reason like you could have possibly prevented it.

Topic #5 Why is sin so enjoyable?

I only ask on my own behalf. I may get ten responses telling me that sin is not enjoyable at all. But in my experience, part of the reason I do not readily give up sin is that it affords me pleasure of some kind. Physical, emotional or mental. I get a high from doing the wrong thing. I wish I hated my sin more. Ive heard and read that once you genuinely hate sin and what it does to you and keeps you from becoming, that is when your relationship with God moves to a whole new level of commitment and enthusiasm.
How can I muster that hatred? It makes sense in my head that when I lie it is affecting those around me and yet.... It occurs to me that when I view inappropriate content that it is likely someone's future wife or at least someone's daughter that is being objectified in a terrible way. I have a little girl now! And yet that only gives me a moment's pause when I make the choice to sin or not. When I choose some random crap I don't even like on TV over spending quality time with my savior, I take selfishness to a whole new level. And yet it is still more pleasing to me than doing the right thing. So again I ask, why - in my brain - does it feel so good to be so bad? Ultimately, it doesn't matter. Either I'll recognize sin for what it is or spend the rest of my life facing the consequences. Pleasurable or not, sin will take me one place and it stands opposed to everything my God holds dear. I can say "Yeah but it's hard to not _____" for so many things. The walk is hard brother. Christian morality ain't for sissies.

Verily I say unto you

Well it's been two weeks since my last blog and you deserve to know what's been going on in my life.
I have two days left in the second part time job I've had. Then I will be, once again, unemployed. Laurie is at this moment scanning an employment newspaper for leads.
As of tomorrow, Emma will have been sick with some kind of bug for 7 days. I didn't know you could be flu-sick for seven days. Laurie was sick for four days. Me and my mother in law, one day each. Nasty.
I'm watching an undervalued little show called "Pushing Daisies". It's quite something. Quirky, funny and a narrator who rhymes.
I'm in a Christmas play. I play a shy postman who goes off to war before realizing the joy of a loving relationship.
I'm going to be doing some holiday baking this year. As gifts, for a shower and for some random person who got my number from the post office bulletin board. Hooray for unorthodox advertising.
Fantasy football's regular season wraps up this week. We will make the playoffs but what state our team will be in... who can say?
New topic to come soon! Stay tuned! Use more exclamation marks!

Are Kiwis for real?

Had a pretty interesting discussion at work today. At lunchtime we got to talking about random facts. Did you know that the banana tree will not independently reproduce? Did you know that sparks fly when you crunch hard mints such as Wint-O-Greens or Certs?
A girl I was sitting with told me that kiwis are not a naturally occurring fruit. They were bred from two other fruits. She didn't say which. Why is it that people who taste things like to find undertones of flavor in them? I was watching Ellen last month and there was this guy raving about the subtle flavors you can taste in wines. Like chocolate, fruit, leather, tobacco and even dirt. Same for coffee. Apparently these drinks don't stand on their own. Do we really expect this from other foods? Cheese that tastes like shoe polish? Ice cream with a hint of wood? Water that reminds me of flowers? No thanks. I'll take my food tasting like it says on the package please.
Positives: Turning 30, not coughing for two days, Baby hugs.
Negatives: Pushing 235, when parts of my anatomy fall asleep, bugs in the house.

Fun Ahoy!

Well this is my favorite time of year. No kidding. I've always loved fall and autumness and all things from October through January 1st. It starts on the 3rd with my parents' anniversary.(thirty seven years)My mom's birthday on the eighth.(fifty six)Canadian Thanksgiving.(which I no longer remember)Halloween.(which was void of candy this year as our church did a reverse trick or treat)Next comes the Cypress Craft Bazaar.(94 dozen cookies sold this year at a cool $780)My birthday(the seventeenth)American Thanksgiving.(Dinner with the Suttons and football, football, football)Emma's 1st birthday.(Laurie is inviting all the other kids born within a couple months of each other in our circle of friends for a party with a tarp, some cake and a bunch of naked babies)And finally Christmas and New Year's round out the festivities.(we no longer give gifts, just charitable contributions)

Topic #4 Would Jesus have a beer with the guys?

I can only guess what is going through the heads of first time readers. No I'm not a drinker and no I'm not against alcohol for Christians. This is really just a forum for discussion. I have been quoted verse after verse, rule after rule and reason after reason as to the questionability of Christians imbibing alcohol and I've got to tell you, I can't find it anywhere. It's like gambling. We(the church) find these behaviors we don't agree with and we stretch to find biblical support to back it up. I'm not for freedom in all things and I'm not a grace monger. We have a responsibility to behave in a self controlled way, but that applies to so much more than what we put in our bodies. If people cared as much about raising their kids right as who does what in their homes, we'd not have the crisis of morality we're facing right now. My guess is that Jesus would go first, were he to come back, to the places we'd least expect him to. Including the local bar.

But Mom, I don't like the taste of Ivory!

Topic #3
Does swearing make you less of a Christian?

I meet with a group of guys. We talk as men do and one of the discussions that has rolled over in my head is the issue of language and coarse joking. I'm not talking about taking the Lord's name in vain but other words not widely accepted in christian circles. There seems to be a belief among my generation, that swearing among christian friends is not as bad as swearing in public or in front of people who would react negatively to those words. I know the verses about there should not be any coarse joking among you but only what is acceptable for building others up. I also know that the world in general has a belief that for the most part Christians don't swear. This leads me to ask certain questions I don't know the answers to. Are certain words offensive to God's ears? Does it show immaturity when we laugh at or use what is considered to be foul language? I know where a lot of people stand on this. They are hardliners. There is to be no unwholesome talk coming from your mouths. The question was raised to me, "Just what is considered unwholesome"? Are there different levels? Are there hard and fast rules? And who says so? Where I come from the word frig was not considered dirty. But I moved to Ohio and was told that it was frowned upon. Now I can't list some of the words that I'm sure are under consideration as coarse for fear of offending certain readers but therein lies the quandary. I would not want to offend a general crowd but when a group of my peers is in agreement about what is and is not acceptable for themselves, what is to stop us from speaking freely and communicating in a way that feels natural?
Listen I'm certainly not an advocate for the F-word or any other questionable language but is it only questionable because we've made it so in society? You can freely drink alcohol in Europe and profess your faith. But here, in certain parts of the country and in certain denominations you cannot. There are strong men and women of God I know who appreciate and use colorful language. Does that make their faith weaker than someone who does not?

I fought the law and we both lost

Topic #2
Why isn't there more justice on earth?

I just got done with a temporary job at which I marked student proficiency exams. During the course of time I came to realize there were certain people who did not deserve to be there. They fell asleep at their desks, they got up and wasted time, they called over supervisors to answer their questions for them. Nothing was done by the bosses. Nothing. I complained about this to my wife at home and she told me it's the same everywhere and to just get used to it and over it. Knowing this as I do, from being more than 10 years old, I wondered what kind of glory it could bring to God to see so much injustice in the world.
My story is a very mild form of annoyance granted. But what about wrongful convictions. Unpaid child support. Mandatory minimums and ridiculous sentencing guidelines. Abuse, murder, corruption. It dizzies the mind. The bible says the Lord will have his justice. In fact it is his alone to mete out. But what is he waiting for? Is his justice so radically different from what I think it is? Would I recognize it if I saw it? Tough questions but it would seem I have to rely on the other things I understand about God to help me deal with this riddle in his nature. I must trust his heart when I cannot see his hand.

Jesus farted and other uncomfortable spiritual truths

I think I want to start a series. I want to examine some of the commonly held beliefs we have that are incorrect. I want to shed light on the darker side of Christianity. In short, I want to blow up your perceptions and conception of God. If we discover things about ourselves along the way, all the better.
Today's topic: How do we serve God at less than our best?

I have had a cold for 2 weeks. My wife is on her second cold in 3 weeks. Our precious daughter has yet to shake the cold she caught at daycare three weeks ago. We are sleep deprived, irritable, symptomatic and generally not in good spirits. I pulled a muscle coughing and I can't comfortably breath right now. That being said, life is not slowing down. It would seem that God wants to see how we handle life when we are fighting our earthly bodies and attitudes. I do not consider myself Job but haven't we all had Job moments? Consider Abraham or Joseph. And isn't it fair to say God still tests the resolve and faith of his followers? It would seem there is a certain amount of "sucking it up" that needs to take place in life. I like to think that it all means something. It would feel better. But what if suffering just happens, and we need to fight through it? What if you never got to see the purpose for your suffering in this lifetime? What if our salvation is the only blessing we have to hold on to? Is it enough?

Too little sleep makes the mind wander

Have you ever just full-on stepped in a pile of dog crap? It's not a great feeling. Speaking of random crap, I have a job. Part time and only for nine days but hey, it's a paycheck. With the promise of more work in November we should be good until Thanksgiving.
Speaking of Thanksgiving, I'm losing my Canadianicity. I have officially forgotten when that holiday is. If not for a call from my Mom I'd have never known.
Speaking of forgetting things, have you ever forgotten to flush. You go to use the toilet and realize the last time you used it something must have slipped your mind. Like flushing.
Speaking of the mind, I feel like I'm losing mine. I make these mental lists of things to do and never do them. Calls, things to remember when I go someplace, brushing my teeth. I'm just plain forgetting.
Speaking of plain, I never eat anything plain anymore. Chips, toast, potatoes, eggs. I need condiments in my life. Everything seems better with mayo.
Speaking of toast, that's kind of like my chances of finding a job in ministry. 0 for 18 on resumes sent so far. Insert empty platitude here.

Fffffantasy Island

Listen, if anyone asks you to be in a fantasy football league, say no. It's not worth it. We won our match up but only because the events that did us in on one hand helped us out on the other. I'll not explain here cause my wife says it's confusing.
I start my temporary job on Friday. Nothing to write home about but hey, it's a paycheck.
I like hosting people in my home. It's not big. It's not beautiful. But it's ours and we love to share it. I like cooking for them and having them sleep in our furnished guest room. That's weird I know but..
Bathing the dogs this morning. Actually we shower them. It's enclosed so no jumping out. They're good about it. Butter runs in before I ask her to. They love getting out and being done. They roll around on the floor trying to smell like dog again. The only problem is the hair. It's everywhere. Mostly on my pillow or any dark shirt I own.
Goals for the year:
Get a job.
Get a job in ministry.
Go to a Blue Jackets Game.
Lose 10 pounds.
Teach Emma to say Mama.
Get some new T-shirts.
Have "Man Night" up and running.
Make one new friend.

Baxter's Freakin Vanilla

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?” Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
~Marianne Williamson~
Thought this was fairly cool. Also Geoff Hooper's new facebook picture is hilarious. Perfect for mocking. It would only have been better if it was Baxter's freakin' Vanilla. With a grenadine syrup.

More than I deserve

I have a wife who loves me.
I have a roof over my head.
I have an all too full belly.
I have a mostly pain free body.
I have a beautiful daughter.
I have a king size bed.
I have two TVs.
I shower with hot water.
I have a savings account.
I have no balance on my credit card.
I have three toilets.
I have AC in my house and my car.
Both my parents are alive.
I have never had to fight for anyone's country.
I have all my hair.
I have multiple sets of clean clothes.
I graduated from college.
I am destined for heaven.
I have great friends.
Faith is remembering I am God's precious treasure, even when I feel utterly worthless.

Washed whiter than....

Don't be alarmed if you notice half my blog gone. I had to sanitize it for reasons I'll never agree with. Just rest assured, my cynical brand of humor will live on. Just in a slightly less off color manner. That is all.
p.s. Sorry to AJ for having a bad night on his comment page. Won't happen again. Cause I'm taking my meds.

Really? ........Really?

Well the total is up to $64 dollars. I got an extravagant tip on a cookie order and as far as I'm concerned, that counts. Keep sendin' those checks!
Today was as typically Jon as it could get. First, I took the wrong route to my job interview this morning. Secondly, because I forgot an important paper in Laurie's office, I needed three attempts to find the building I needed to get to. Third, I had to sit in the guy's office whilst he called Bethany to make sure my Bachelor's degree was on the up and up.(It was.)
I then proceeded onward to get a toy for our child from a secondhand store Laurie had spoken to. Well lo and behold, the exit ramp was closed. After I had gotten turned around I went into the store only to find they had sold it.
Have you ever had anyone give you the finger on the road? It seems way more mean spirited when you're driving. My Mom gave me the finger once. I'm sure I'd just been smart with her.
I can fit half the length of Em's arm in my mouth. I know this because she seems to like testing my oral capacity with her hands.
Can I just say I'm so happy I only have hair growing on semi-normal parts of my body. Back hair being the weirdest and not very thick. No nose hair, ear hair or out of control kind of stuff. I saw a guy yesterday with eyebrows that had to be an inch long. Like he grows them out on purpose. Freaks me out man. Later wieners.

Progression and regression

Ten more dollars to add to the tally. That brings the grand total of operation "Feed Jon's Family" to $40. See, I told you I'd keep you updated.
On a sourer note, my dog peed on the floor this morning. Now she either did it for spite, cause she really couldn't hold it or because she has another infection of some kind. This coupled with the baby's unwillingness to embrace slumber and my unemployment have made for some hard times in maintaining the "Joy of the Lord".
I've completed my sixteenth mix CD and it ranges from Rhianna to Hinder to Norah Jones. I just love music. I love breaking down the different layers. I love singing harmonies. I love air guitaring or synthing along. I love sharing it with others.
OK gotta search more jobs. (Sigh)

Christmas wishes

What do I want for Christmas this year? Mom wants to know and I don't know what to tell her. Oh I think of things, I just can't remember to write them down anywhere. We don't give gifts anymore. Everyone has too much stuff. So we make a donation to something worthwhile and God-honoring in their names. Feels christmassy.
Well, fantasy football has begun and let the suck fest begin. One running back down and one bad choice on wide outs. Other than that our team is pretty much performing up to expectations. This is going to be my last year I've already decided. Even if we win the whole thing. I try not to participate too long in things I suck at. Except Christianity.
Man church. I'll let it resonate with you. Let it permeate your souls. Percolate in your minds. This has become my unofficial mission. To make church make sense for men. To offer something that will inspire and excite men about Christ and his mission. Feel free to tell me what would get you involved. Sorry, no naked chicks.(Neil!)
I just fell up the stairs. With a pop in my hands. An open pop. 'Nuff said.

Rescue 911!

Man I loved that show! And that was before Shatner started doing all the weird roles. Well I officially quit job #2 in 2 months. I'm starting to frustrate my wife. Kidding. She wants what's best for me and is more patient than I deserve. She also hugs and kisses our child in her sleep. Weird. The job hunt is on and I'm not going to stop till I get what I want. (hopefully)
I'm starting to think the hair is going to have to get cut. The reality is people judge you on your appearance and I need all the help I can get. This year marks the 10th anniversary of being on academic probation at Bethany. My first semester third year. Ahh memories. Lighters, living with Papa in the basement, and the only tournament Bethany men's softball has ever won!

Don't stop reading

I need your help. I want to quit my job but I need to have money to pay the bills while I look. I haven't had any luck at all in looking for part time work and I really want to do full time ministry. This search may take a while and in the meantime I am asking you, my readership, and friends for whatever support you can muster. I need roughly $500. That is a donation of just 5 dollars from 100 people.
I realize this might leave a bad taste in some mouths. To these people I can only say I feel this is what I think I should do. I want to look wholeheartedly for a position. I'm not lazy. If I get a part time job I will inform you through this and my facebook account. I promise if I get more than I need I will donate it to an African Relief cause. Here's the address:
Jon Hurd
6107 Federalist Dr.
Galloway, OH 43119
USA

Thanks in advance and I'll keep you posted.

Feeling upbraided and rightfully so

Me
In my last blog I sat complaining about what's wrong with church. I'm not backing down from that sentiment and I still want to hear from you about that but I was sitting in church Saturday night and was reminded that there are more important things than my personal feelings about how things are run. I want to share with you the outline of Dave's sermon without permission.
Dave
Why I believe In and Belong to the Church
1. Only the church helps me deal in both worlds- Time and Reality
The church helps me understand the word of God
The church helps me hear and listen to the Spirit of God
The church helps me be like the Son of God

2. The church is a moral compass in a world of moral chaos.
We are called to be salt in a bland world and light in a dark world. The church needs to step up and make a difference now like it did before. Slavery, women's rights, child labor, poverty, hospitals, schools, orphanages, mental institutions, prisons, YMCA, hospitals.

3. The church is a community of grace and healing in a world of hurt
Do you want people like that in your church?

4. The church reveals the dignity of every human being (1 Peter 2:9)

5. Christ believes in the church and I believe in Christ. (Matthew 16:18)

Me
Church, in my opinion, is in need of an overhaul. Church can be boring, it can misfire and it can be lame. But church my friends, is not the church. The church is who we are to be and we should reflect and represent our head, our leader, our brother in arms, Christ Jesus our Lord.

50 is the new 30!

This happens to be my fiftieth post. Of this I am proud considering a year ago I thought this blog extinct. Speaking of things that are extinct..... what is up with Shannon and the woman?
I hate conventional church. I hate the way it is packaged, presented and performed. Whatever happened to creativity? Or spontaneity? I feel like I need to burn the place to the ground and start over.
You can help me. (Not burn down the church, I wasn't really going to do that) Let me know what church would look like for you.
Less formal, more music, no music, less talk, no offering asked for, more teaching?
Humor, drama, instrumental, food, intimate, more dangerous, confession, communion, practical?
Challenging, beautiful, somber, interactive, media-oriented, choir, short, long, old, new, fun, active?
I could go on but I want to be surprised. Seriously, hit me.

Family is overated!

Well we've got family here and it's great....except Emma now is rejecting her former bedtime. It's not their fault, she just seems to get thrown off her rhythm every time there are house guests. Dinner was perfectly grilled hamburgers, homemade oven fries and fresh corn on the cob.
Having two babies in the house is interesting. Mine is not crawling yet so I'm seeing what I have to look forward to. Getting into the dog's dishes, crawling up the first stairs, grabbing random items out of bags.
Chocolate Lucky Charms makes its own chocolate milk!
Baby is in the throws of turmoil, must go settle her down. Sigh.

Pictures of the peach